Seeing the light that shines

A perfect day for sitting by the Jotul watching the rain beat down on the ground, droplets bouncing on the deck, streaming down the culverts, branches sagging under the weight of the downfall. Then brief ambient sunlight trying to break through and the mysterious sound of rain where there is no rain, dripping off the branches, running into the gulleys, draining into the redwood leaves on the ground or through the pebbles?

A perfect day for jazz (thanks, Tim, for the idea) and redirecting the mind to creativity and into the moment. Away from the time clock, 2 minutes, 30 minutes, a day, a weekend, a year. Listening to Vince Guaraldi and Django Reinhardt right now, a favorite. If I could choose any moment in history to go to in the "time machine", it would be that NY nightclub, after hours, with Coltrane exploring his universe and taking us along for the ride, or that wild night in Harlem with Fats Waller bouncing us along his groove to rhythmic bliss and unrepentant joy. And wherever path it was that Bill Evans travelled, after all those long hours of solitude while he honed his art, the music, learning how to master that beast called a piano and share with us his discovery of himself in it.

But for today, this rainy day, I thank them for their gentle persuasion to dream, their inspiration and their courage to share their heart. Thanks to the musicians who take the road with no guarantees, no pension, no career path, no contracts, no acknowledgment, no security (or the illusion of one), most of the time no cash, and plenty of criticism. Thanks to all of them, the successes, the has-beens, and the little-knowns. All are part of the story of music.

Today is a day to see the light that shines in all of us, and the wonder of the world around us. Sit back, listen, and notice the simple beauty of life.

p.s. I won the company cookie contest with my interpretation of Ina Garten's thumb cookies. I added pecans and unsalted butter, and apricot jam and they were awesome! If I say so myself. I never did receive the Golden Spatula that I won, although I got the certificate. But I am but a mere temp, so maybe that is why. The other cookie in the picture is vinegar cookies, which may have been good, but with the name I didn't try them, Mine were wicked good. the best apricot jam! Thanks to a great chef, Ina Garten. Her recipes are always good.

 

Ah, old man winter has arrived

Yes, we have dodged the raindrops for too long here in California. We have a drought, we need rain. Well, finally we are getting it. It's coming down. I definitely feel a love-hate relationship with rain. There are times when it is so relaxing and comforting. And by the blazing woodstove, it so deliciously slows down the race to nowhere I often find myself caught up in. Sit by the fire and listen to the rain. Simple.

I also am happy to see the plants and animals getting the water they need to flourish, even the skunks, coyotes and mountain lions seen in these parts. If you listen closely you can hear and feel the relief as the ground becomes saturated and see the wilted leaves filling with water and imagine the wild animals drinking their fill at the river.

The hate part is just a natural concern about the power going out just when Downton is about to start, or that a tree will decide to fall over at any time, in any direction, and fall where it may. Being surrounded by giants (of the sequoia type) informs that concern. I've seen my neighbor's house cut in half by a madrone and really don't want to experience that. But it's not in my hands.

So winter is here. And February...which is my tough month. I lost two of the most loved people in my life in this month, and it is too populated with ghosts for me; my mother and the love of my life, Ken Baker.

Although these sad events happened many years ago, they still are with me.

My mother was such a loving and caring person. She still is my example of how to love unconditionally for me. Although only 5 foot tall, she could be a mother bear when it came to her brood. And her intellect was never fully acknowledged, although I recognized it. She worked as a licensed vocational nurse for many years and got her RN degree at 50 while raising 6 children and working full time. She came from a childhood of poverty and struggle. One of two kids with an absent father whom she adored, and a tough mother who had to support her children in an era when women couldn't expect decent wages for their work. Grandma had a hard exterior and my mother struggled with self-esteem her entire life, possibly as a result of that harshness. Still she retained her compassion for others.

I helped her in her final years, trying with all my might to undo the effects of years of diabetes and heart disease. And I cherish that time with her. I got to know her and understand her, help her in some way, and love her even more deeply. And when that day came that the doctors couldn't renew her health, when the damage was too severe, it came as a shock and a deep pain. She was much too young and it hurt to see her go. This many years later, I still wish I could talk to her and share my troubles and triumphs. Just go to the drugstore and buy tissues and hangers and spend the day watching baseball. She was a real sports fan of the highest order. I miss her.

Today is the 15th anniversary of Ken's death. Or at least of the day that I learned he had died. And my love for him has not faded, although life has continued to go forward. I think of him almost every day. He was another example of a person who cared and loved unconditionally. He didn't judge people, he found humor in the human condition and enjoyed life as it came. I learned so much from him. An accomplished musician, he found his passion playing blues saxophone as a member of John Lee Hooker's house band for many years. I haven't been able to listen to his music until very lately out of sadness, and found a video of his performance today that reminded me of the times we shared, although it also broke my heart all over again. This was a tour that I remember well, as he came home to me after weeks in Europe, and was ill when he returned. He brought me a t-shirt from the festival, that has fallen apart but I still keep it. He was ill and struggled to get healthy after that but only had 7 years left in his brief life. But in spite of my own emotions, he was another loving person who was not recognized for his intellect and gifts, and I feel fortunate to have known him and loved him and shared a special trust with a sensitive, gifted artist and human being. I miss him to this day. Here's a link to the video. http://youtu.be/RtTLsqxRKAE

In the video, you will also see Vala Cupp. A good friend who I got to know over many years. A sweet woman with a beautiful voice and a loving spirit. who is also no longer with us. A great loss as well.

So that is my day. A feeling of loss for the people I loved who are gone now, and a feeling of gratefulness, for having known and touched these exceptional people. And so February goes. Spring can really hang you up the most.

Chard galore!

As promised, here is the picture of the cord of wood delivered today. And it was an adventure. My driveway is a bit slippery and steep and I've had pickups slip and slide trying to get back up it, so I warned the driver about it and he agreed to back the big dump truck just a tad down the grade and then dump the load. It was exciting. Dump trucks are cool. He did the job and I have a nice cord ready to go when needed. That is a big deal here is the frozen tundra called the coastal redwoods. Now for the fun part, lugging it down the hill and stacking it up. Maybe I'll wait 'til tomorrow.

And the chard...the chard. Anyone for some chard pudding, chard bread, chard soup, chard chips? The leaves measure 18" long. Wow. Big chard country. I don't even water it, but it keeps coming.

With Thanksgiving Day coming up, I've been watching the Food Network Thanksgiving Day special. Flay, Alton, Giada, and coolness, Ina Garten. She has some of the best recipes. I like her show, too. She was the go-to person on the show. To brine or not to brine, that is the question. Flay made his own special stuffing, which had about a gallon of chicken stock in it. I think he was a little heavy handed with the stock. It had lots of stuff in it. Ina's stuffing was a custard-style that looked interesting, but it doesn't go in the bird. I gotta have mine all juicy with turkey juice. I like my mom's stuffing. It isn't a T-day without that stuffing. Recipe? Very simple. Mom used to toast the bread herself, or we would pitch in doing the toasting, Good old white bread. Onions, butter, sage, celery, chicken stock to soak the bread, salt and pepper. That's it. Simple and sooo good. Stuff that turkey!
 

A Feast Fit for a Cheesehead

During my recent trip to NY, I had the great pleasure of a cheese and wine living room picnic with my son and his wife. We made the trip to Whole Foods at Union Square (the center of the universe, I hear) and hovered around the bakery, cheese and meat counters ogling the delicious prosciutto and cured meats, the fresh bread, the tempting cheeses from all over the world. It took a long time to make our choices but we managed to limit ourselves to a reasonable horde.

Our feast consisted of Italian bread, a good olive oil, roasted red peppers from Greece, a kalamata olive tapenade, Dijon, paper-thin fresh prosciutto, and 4 kinds of cheese: aged fontina, herbed cheddar, aged provolone, and a double brie. We chose a red from Italy at the Aster Place wine emporium, Fatalone Teres Primativo, that paired nicely with the rustic theme.

The best thing about the picnic was the company and having time to enjoy those simple pleasures with my son and his beautiful wife.

But because of my competitive nature, we had to have a Best Bite contest. We tried combinations of all the elements and the winner?

Best bite unanimous winner was aged fontina with a drizzle of olive oil, tapenade, prosciutto and red pepper on a slice of Italian bread. Delicioso!

No farewell picnic would be truly complete without a final pastry from my favorite bakery, so to top it off we shared a pistachio layer cake filled chocolate tulip.

Farewell NYC for now!

Halloween in Sleepy Hollow

Cooperstown, NY

The Legend of Sleepy Hollow is the story of the headless horseman who rides across the dark bridge in Sleepy Hollow while Ichabod Crane hides in terror! I am in Sleepy Hollow country in upstate NY and came across a covered bridge in a little country town. There are fields of corn awaiting harvest running from here to our baseball mecca, Cooperstown, NY. In Cooperstown, we visited the Baseball Hall of Fame to see the artifacts of the sport we love and examine the old and the new in the game of baseball.



Statue near Otsego Lake in
Cooperstown

Lidia Bastianich

 It was part of my vacation in NYC where I visited the marketplace called Eataly. The block-length building across the street from Washington Square and the Flatiron Building is bursting with restaurants, fish and meat markets, vegetable market, bakery, cookbooks, dishes and pots, cheeses, cured meats, pastas, sauces and spices, wines, beers, coffees, etc. etc. It was started by Lidia Bastianich and Mario Batali to bring Italy to NY and America. I went there a few years ago when it was the first Christmas season after opening and it was crowded; it is even more crowded now. It just happened that Lidia was there while I was there this week and I made a point of getting her new cookbook and standing in line to meet her and get her to sign my book. She is so gracious and gifted and I love her cooking show on PBS. Highly recommended for serious cooks.

Cheese counter at Eataly

 Eataly has an incredible cheese counter. I stood in amazement and couldn't decide what to try, it was too much to take in. Same with the pasta section, which has  at least 100 different kinds of pasta. So impressive. If in NY, I suggest checking it out, it has something for every foodie.

Veniero's Pasticceria

And when done with the prosciutto and pasta, head down to Veniero's bakery on 11th St and 3rd Ave. Just walking into that place is an experience. They have been in NY since 1894. It is traditional Italian pastries, cakes, cannoli, cookies, it is just beautiful and delicious. Take a number unless you go weekday odd hours because there's usually a line out the door. Took some pics because presentation is everything. The locals know this place.
Buon appetito!

 

Tried a nice red and a white during my food adventures in NY. One was a white from a NY winery in the Finger Lakes area, Dr. Konstantin Frank Winery. They are known for their exceptional Riesling. The other an Italian Valpolicella Masi that was very good, similar to a chianti, with soft tannins and a good fruit finish.

 

The autumn leaves...

Drift by my window...

Autumn arrives with a mild breeze, a hint of winter, and a helluva a lot of chard. I can't eat that much chard. But it does tell me something for next year. Chard grows well here, don't plant so much chard, deer don't like chard, but it looks cool.

I got exactly one single tomato that never ripened, planted too late, and zucchini, that the deer ate. Which is OK. I did get one decent sized zuch that I used in a ratatouille and it was one of my best ratas, one of my signature dishes, (hint, lots of herbs). They also ate my geraniums; but how can you fault Bambi?

The culprits are a family of deer: buck with amazing horns, two little Bambis, one fawn, one buck with tiny horns, and Mom, that graze the nearby small park within a short walk away, and they walk in a daily circuit that includes my street. I fear that they are too comfortable around people and dogs, people who drive carelessly, dogs who are dogs, and the thought of seeing them injured haunts me. I brake for skunks. There is a coyote I have seen twice who also frequents the street. I love them all and they can have my geraniums and zucchini. And even the tomato, which nobody wants, including me.

As the world turns...my little cat, Stella, is finding life more challenging, (aren't we all?) She went blind with a detached retina this week. Caused by high blood pressure; older cats get that. She is 22 years old, that is 100 equivalent in human years. She is dealing with it, after some serious blood pressure medicine, a vet bill, and a lot of love from her mom and her dog. Saw Penny lick her for the first time last night. Luckily she has one eye still working, so she can manage to cross the "bridge" I built from my bed to the chest of drawers where her food dish is. She's figured that out now. She is my idol. Didn't realize just how much I want her to stick around until I faced life without her.

A few people, who really don't get it, seriously said to me "well, she's had a long life...well, if the vet says toast her, it's best to do it...well, just put her to sleep". Yeah... in a nice way...those folks don't get it.  Perhaps, they have never loved an animal of another species. Perhaps, they don't understand a relationship of 22 years; whatever it is, I forgive them for their ignorance.
http://youtu.be/-FhcKJMQeyc

She is a cat. A simple house cat. A mutt. I didn't pay anything for her. I got her from a litter in the Santa Cruz Mountains from a friend 23 years ago. I didn't even choose her initially. I chose her sibling, Blanche, a beautiful all-white kitten, Snowball, they tentatively named. I was so excited to pick her up 8 weeks later.

I worked at Network General with her owner, in fact, I hired him, Ed, and he convinced me that I needed this kitten, I visited them at 8 weeks with my son way up at the top of the Santa Cruz mountains. I fell in love with Blanche (Snowball). 2 weeks later, when I came to pick her up, they informed me that the gray one had to go with the white one, they had bonded. I accepted them both. And for the next 18 years, it was a wonderful relationship of commitment and love. Blanche, Stella, and me. Husbands, boyfriends, houses, adventures, cross-country trips, jobs, assholes, traumas, dogs, they stood by me all the while. They needed love, food, cat litter. Blanche was the sweet one. Always sweet and gentle. Just loved love. Stella, the toughie, in charge, BIG attitude. Aloof, sweet but tough. The two of them never weighed more than 7 pounds, but they ruled.

I lost Blanche a few years ago. To a mysterious and sudden neurological problem. My theory, a black widow spider bite. But you have to give that little, gentle spirit credit. After her initial near-death crisis, she held on for 9 months, fighting back; but she eventually lost the battle, peacefully dying on my dog's bed. I still await her annoying constant jumps on my lap and resting position across my stomach at night. We still miss her.

Now Stella, at 22, is nearing her end. Due to old age, high blood pressure and blindness. The winds of time are blowing towards us both. I am aware and I am feeling it. I love the old girl. Yes, blind, yes, needs medicine, yes, sits on my bed waiting for me every night. I wait for her, too. And I wait and will wait. She is more than a task or a duty, she is in my DNA. Understand that, sad animal-haters. She won't be "put to sleep" because she is a hassle. It will be because she is in pain and I can't do anything to relieve that suffering. A pet is a life commitment, not a companion until it is inconvenient, after 8 years when they are sick, or when it is too expensive. Love is a life-long commitment.

Stella is still fighting on. I will hold on with her until she is ready to go. And I will know when that time comes. But until then, Stella Lives!
 

What happened to the pomegranates?

Did you know that many biblical scholars think that the "apple" of Adam and Eve fame was actually a pomegranate? Little trivia there...

Just when I was getting to love poms in everything from tea to sparkling water, all of a sudden, they are gone. Did we decimate the pomegranate population in our zest? Just wondering.

So summer comes to the mountain. Birds are having a field day and chirping like mad. Lovely. Lots of beautiful woodpeckers at the bird feeder. Love those guys. Saw a family of deer yesterday, mom, dad, and two fawns, little bambis.

My garden is growing with squash taking off and over, and the chard is ready to pluck. Got some herbs going too, Thai basil which is a real winner. My gargantuan rosemary bush didn't make it through the wet winter, so I'll need to replenish that soon. So nice to walk outside and grab some fresh rosemary for so many dishes.

Tried out some French cheese and a nice red wine with it. Epoisses is a very fragrant cheese, similar to brie. Very fragrant. And remarkably subtle tasting for all that "nose". It has a thick outer crust that keeps all that goodness in. This is a cheese that does best when allowed to warm on the counter. Nice on a cracker or baguette. For pairing, I chose a 2010 Hahn Winery Meritage that can stand up to all that cheese but adds a layer of smokiness, fruitiness and depth. It's a nice marriage.

Lots happening in the night sky these days. Asteroids, planets aligning, eclipses on the way. With summer skies in the forecast, I expect to get the scope out and start exploring the universe.